Power to Unite or Power to Divide?

Whilst entering a meeting I was slipped a scorecard by a colleague headed Buzzword Bingo. The card contained a grid of nine buzzwords (e.g., paradigm shift, learns, USP, private beta, etc). Cards with different combinations of buzzwords were distributed amongst the attendees who were asked to mark each buzzword as it was used during the meeting. When all the buzzwords on a card had been used, the card owner was asked to shout “Bingo!”

You may not consider this to be a productive exercise but the meeting, which involved people from different disciplines, was pivotal to a key project and the colleague handing out the cards was concerned that meetings were not as productive as they could be, because of ‘in’ terms or abbreviations used by each department.

Where people feel excluded by language they do not understand, they tune-out (most common), ask for clarification (very rare) or they rebel.

If we stop to examine what we say, we will be amazed how many of our daily communications are filled with jargon, abbreviations or trite phrases.

Rather than being a means of increasing connection and knowledge, our conversations and communications become a source of division & discontent.

Narcissism and narcissistic abuse is filled with terms that quickly divide if they are not understood. Gaslighting, hoovering, triangulation: three powerful and important terms for understanding how narcissists operate, but three terms that are splattered across article, images and videos that often leave those who most need to know (victims) excluded.

Professional circles use these terms because, as part of their training, they learn the true meanings and origins. Everyday people who also NEED to understand what professionals talk about, do not.

I find it fascinating that the idea of being special, set apart and unique, a member of a small, elite group, with 'power over' others is a basic tenet of narcissism, a condition that irreparably divides any setting in which it becomes embedded. 

By using exclusive language we prevent people from learning what they need to know for safety, security and survival. We help narcissists and their activities to remain hidden. It can be easy to assume that others understand what we mean but isn’t it just as easy to simply explain a term in plain English when we use it, especially when we are spreading a message that can literally save lives?

This Narcissistic Abuse Network (N.A.N) Blog strives to demystify jargon and use language that allows everyone to understand items of critical importance. We include an ever-expanding glossary of terms commonly used when talking about narcissists and narcissistically (emotionally) abuse relationships, on our Free Resources page. We have also written a short glossary of the terms and words used to describe narcissists and narcissism.

We hope you find that our articles are helpful, empowering you and equipping you to escape (or help others to escape) the void of emotionally abusive relationships and find a new life that you did not think was possible.

You CAN do it: many others already have.

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You will also find the following links helpful for understanding narcissism and its impacts on our lives.

SAFETY ONLINE

How to Protect Our Online Activity When Living in an Abusive Relationship

TERMS AND DESCRIPTIONS USED WHEN TALKING ABOUT NARCISSISM

Terminology and Definitions Used When Talking About Narcissism

IDENTIFYING NARCISSISTS

How to Identify The Different Types of Narcissist

How to Spot Narcissists and Narcissism

Quick Quiz: Find Out if You Are Affected by Narcissists or Narcissism

BUILDING YOUR SUPPORT TEAM

How to build an Effective Support System - Strategies for Victims of Narcissistic Abuse

DIVORCING A NARCISSIST

Divorcing a Narcissist - What You Should Know About the Legal System and the Courts